Who Needs Sex Toys?

This morning started off like every other morning...I got up before the birds to let the boys out and get their breakfast ready. While they ate, I put the coffee on and fired up my trusty laptop so I could check my emails. Suddenly from upstairs came a blood curdling scream. I bolted upstairs not sure what I'd find once I got there! As I rounded the corner into our bedroom I saw Steve sitting up in bed holding a dustpan. A dustpan you ask? Yes a dustpan! Apparently he had rolled over onto the sharp edge and impaled himself. Why would normal, sane people sleep with a dustpan in their bed? WE don't...Remy does...he likes to hide his toys in our bed. We often find his favourite stuffed monkey in there, or his bones...the odd antler has turned up between the sheets..but today was the first time he put the dustpan in there. Along with the dustpan were two half chewed, smelly old bones and a spoon. Now I ask you people...who needs sex toys???